Browsing Category Sport
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Brazil v Netherlands, Germany v Argentina
Brazil 0 Netherlands 3 I wake up at 3:00am in a foreign city in a foreign country – you’d perhaps call it Sydney, New South Wales – and ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Brazil v Germany, Netherlands v Argentina
Brazil 1 Germany 7 It’s only on a Saturday morning, now three or four days after the event that I can make sense of the whole affair, my ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Argentina v Belgium, Netherlands v Costa Rica
Argentina 1 Belgium 0 Dear Mr Tyler, proselytising does not suit you, especially at 2:15 in the morning our time or whenever it was you decided to have ...
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Football 1
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Germany v France, Brazil v Colombia
France 0 Germany 1 Because I somehow got roped into watching two episodes of the 1997 adventure series Conan the Adventurer – think Hercules or Xena, but with about 1/10th of the budget, awful ...
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Football 1
All Quiet on the Eastern Front: What happened to Eastern Europe at Brazil 2014?
Most people probably haven’t noticed, but something’s been missing from the second round stage of these World Cup finals. Those of us who grew up watching the World ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Germany v Algeria, Argentina v Switzerland, Belgium v USA
Germany 2 Algeria 1 Who knows what the problem was, but I only managed to get up at about 7:00, so I completely missed the first half of ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Brazil v Chile, Colombia v Uruguay, Costa Rica v Greece
Brazil 1 Chile 1 – Brazil win on penalties In the Elizabethan ‘Great Chain of Being’, there’s a place for everything and everything is in its place. God ...
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Football
Der Beißende Luis: Shocking Stories from the Life of Luis Suarez
Struwwelpeter is a book of moral tales and lessons familiar to many children in German-speaking countries. Inspired by Heinrich Hoffman’s book, Shoot Farken presents Der Beißende Luis (The Biting Luis), ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Italy v Uruguay, Greece v Côte d’Ivoire, France v Ecuador, Algeria v Russia
Italy 0 Uruguay 1 How do we decide on whose terms any given match is played? If the match is played between two sides of considerable stylistic variance, ...
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Football
World Cup Farken: The USA doesn’t need to win the World Cup, they have already won
The match was over. Team USA had lost to Germany 1-0 but had also won qualification for the knockout phase of the 2014 FIFA World Cup courtesy of ...
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Football
World Cup Farken: Screw the pseudo-football intellectuals, I’m jumping on the Uruguayan Magic Bus
‘I feel stupid and contagious Here we are now; entertain us’ Kurt Cobain Fuck, it must be hard. Fuck, it must be so hard staying up to watch ...
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Football
Arrivederci Andrea Pirlo: Italy’s improv master exits on a blue note
The World Cup has lost one of its great craftsman with the exit of Italy and Andrea Pirlo from the group stage. “Don’t play what’s there; play what’s ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Australia v Spain, Croatia v Mexico
Australia 0 Spain 3 I woke up at what would have been half time and considered the options – stay in bed, or find some courage and go find ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Germany v Ghana, Nigeria v BiH, S Korea v Algeria, USA v Portugal
Germany 2 Ghana 2 Martin Tyler is the king of English language commentators for all sorts of different reasons; his professionalism, his wide-ranging knowledge, the way he reads ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Italy v Costa Rica, France v Switzerland, Honduras v Ecuador
Italy 0 Costa Rica 1 Get up at 2:53am, and one choc ripple biscuit later I feel that I’m getting better at this business. I find that Costa ...
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Football
World Cup Farken: The Guide to surviving Brazilian TV Reporters, U.S. Soccer Fans and the rare dull game
This piece was supposed to be about the Japan v Greece match I attended at the Arena das Dunas in Natal last Thursday night. I really can’t be ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Spain v Chile, Cameroon v Croatia, Uruguay v England, Japan v Greece
Spain 0 Chile 2 After comfortably surviving the early game, fatigue sets in during the one hour wait until the next game. TV is more moribund than usual ...
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Football 3
Oops! Wrong Country: How I Ended Up Watching the Socceroos in a Bolivian Jungle Town
It’s a disturbingly unsettling 35 degrees. 100% humidity. Sweat seeps from every crack and orifice. There isn’t even a hint of an inkling of a gentle breeze to ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Brazil v Mexico, Russia v S Korea, Australia v The Netherlands
Brazil 0 Mexico 0 I am woken gently by my old man at 5:10am and asked, the way that substitute teachers are apparently asked, if I would like ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Germany v Portugal, Iran v Nigeria, USA v Ghana
Germany 4 Portugal 0 I wake at 3:15am and, unlike yesterday, decide to make a fist of watching the rest of the early game between a genuine heavyweight ...
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Football
World Cup Farken: Believing to win with the Yanks
Last Saturday night during the Italy v England match I tweeted. Natal weather update. Gone from raining cats and dogs to raining big Saint Bernards. Now I know ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Côte d’Ivoire v Japan, France v Honduras, Argentina v BiH
Côte d’Ivoire 2 Japan 1 Gary Bloom is commentating this match, and all I can think of is how much this feels like 1994, back when Bloom was ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Australia v Chile, Uruguay v Costa Rica, Italy v England
Chile 3 Australia 1 Unlike some other extant South Melbourne fans – a very small minority I assure you – I have no regrets about continuing to support the Socceroos ...
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Football
The Heavy Sleeper’s World Cup Review: Brazil v Croatia, Spain v Netherlands
Brazil 3 Croatia 1 Unusually toss and turn all night instead of sleeping like a brick, waking up in time to miss most of the anthems, which is ...
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Football
World Cup Farken: Puto!! Celebrating victory with the Mexicans
The cancelled flight from Lisbon to Recife. The look on your face when you realise you will miss your connection to Natal. That sinking feeling when you depart ...
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Football
The Spirit of 74
A rag-tag bunch of semi-professionals led by a street-wise war orphan arrived in West Germany 40 years ago to take on the football world’s elite. And so was ...
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Football
The Short Sad History of Shit Socceroos World Cup Songs
After 32 years of hurt, Australian football fans have been blessed with three successive appearances in the World Cup. This most welcome blessing has also been accompanied by ...
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Australian Rules
Support Shoot Farken, Buy a Shoot Farken T-shirt
A new design has entered the T-shirt Hall of Fame, joining iconic T-shirts designs like the “Austin 3:16”, “Choose Life” and “Vote for Pedro”. The new Shoot Farken ...
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Football 3
Soccer and Anzac: Forgetting and Remembering in Western Sydney
Soccer has trouble remembering itself. This failing leaves it open to accusations of foreignness and unbelonging, accusations levelled from without and often complacently accepted from within. One of ...
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Football 6
Never Mind The Football: Punk’s World Cup Eleven
THE PREAMBLE I am a simple man. I like my steak bloody, my wife in various forms of undress and my beer alcoholic. With the big “40” bearing ...
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